Nothing to Gain
by Ducky1
Summary: {Chapter 3 Uploaded!} “How long do you think you can keep this a secret of him?” Yolei questioned. “You know he’s going to find out sooner or later. Why do you keep it hidden? It’s not like what he thinks matters to you anymore…”
1. Prologue

Nothing to Gain

Nothing to Gain

**Disclaimer: ****I don't own Digimon, nor will I ever and I'm getting pretty tired of writing stupid disclaimers when people know very well that I don't own nor have the money necessary to purchase it. So let's just leave it at that.**

_A/N: __This will probably be my last Digimon fic for a while and I plan for it to be different. Digimon and other Digi-Destined will only have minor parts in this story. It mainly focuses on all of the twelve Digi Destined growing up, leaving behind their child hood. Dana is still featured in this and I will try not to give her a very big or exaggerated roll, but she probably will have one…Sorry.I hope to leave you all in suspense and to give you a more realistic feel towards the story. This story will also be told from the person's point of view at somepoints…so if you get confused tell me. If there is any change between point of views or scenes it will be noted with a *._

**Prologue******

In all my life I never thought this would happen to me. Well maybe I did think about it, but never thought that it would actually happen so early in my life when I wasn't ready for this responsibility. So here I am on a plane home for the first time in three years having never made contact with anyone back home. They all must hate me. I wouldn't be surprised if they did. I stifle a laugh at the thought of my mother trying to contact me. By phone, letter and email. It's pretty pathetic what I had done, but it was the only way I could think of leaving my old life behind. What better way then to cease contact with all the people whom you know and love?

My friends here in America knew that something was up with me, but I just denied it. Just like I denied having ever gotten drunk that night at that stupid party and…oh I can't even say it! That's why I'm on this plane now. Flight 109 too Tokyo, Japan. They don't even know I'm coming. How stupid of me. I should just turn back now! I can't believe this is happening to me! But, I've never been known to have the best of luck. So here I am telling you my point of view. Here is what happened that day, the day that I left my old life behind.

*

I woke up early one Saturday morning, exited for what was to await me that day. That day was three years ago when I didn't have the many responsibilities that would be bestowed upon me in another six months. Mind you, I still had responsibilities but not of this magnitude. Sure it was up to me to save the world a few times, but this! I wasn't ready for. As I was saying…

I woke on a beautiful Saturday morning, not a cloud in the sky, glad that another threat was put to rest. The last few weeks were spent answering questions about what had happened on the Internet and the others, as well as I were glad that it was over. The Digital World was still safe from the clutches of human scientists wanting to dissect it to find out what makes it and its inhabitants click. We managed to lie our way through the many interviews, except for Joe who kept stammering with fear.

I quickly dressed into a pair of comfortable jeans, a black and gray stripped turtleneck and a red fleece vest and put my now somewhat lengthy hair in a ponytail that was quite high. I no longer had the blue highlights in my hair. I can thank Kimimon, my other form for that. As soon as I finished dressing I stepped out of my room and was quickly greeted by the voice of my adoptive father.

"Good morning dear." He said as he passed me by and stepped into the kitchen where I could smell bacon and eggs being cooked by my adoptive mother.

As I stepped into the kitchen my mother turned around and greeted me with her beautiful smile. Even if I wanted to I could never forget the way she smiled at us when we walked into the kitchen for breakfast. To me, she had fulfilled her destiny and was happy with her life and at the time, so was I.

"Could you go and wake up Izzy please." She asked politely. I nodded curtly and proceeded back the way I had come.

I soon came to a closed door and put my ear to it. I laughed when I heard snoring coming from the other side. Even though I bugged Izzy all the time about his snoring, he still denied that he snored at all. I quietly twisted the doorknob and stealthily made my way into the room. I tiptoed to the bottom of his bed and I jumped.

*

A yelp and laughter soon followed Dana's little jump. She had fulfilled her mission by scaring the heebee jeebees out of Izzy. He rolled over on his bed and sat up just as Dana sat beside him convulsing with laughter.

"What did you do that for?" He asked, rather angry that this red headed hyena disturbed his slumber.

Dana looked at Izzy and was about to reply when she started laughing again, but this time it would be Izzy who was the one who would be laughing. Dana was laughing so hard that she knocked herself off the bed and onto the floor. Izzy tried to contain himself but the look on her face was just priceless as she fell. Dana stood up with a more serious look on her face now.

"Mom told me to come and wake you up, so I did." She said as she turned to leave. "Breakfast is ready."

Just after Dana had left his room, Izzy began to dress and was out of his room in no time, sitting at the table with the rest of his family for their morning breakfast.

He soon appeared in the kitchen wearing an orange T-shirt and blue cargo pants. Dana was sitting at the table chatting with their father while their mother listened attentively to the conversation that was taking place. Izzy sat down right in the middle of the conversation and his mother passed him his breakfast.

"…And just as I walked into the sound room I slipped and fell right on my butt." Dana said, laughing. "I can just picture my legs going out from under me." She said gleefully as she continued to laugh at her stupidity.

Both Mr. and Mrs. Izumi joined in as well. The house resonated with laughter.

"What happened?" Izzy questioned as he shoved a fork-full of eggs in his mouth.

"Dana was just telling us about yesterday when she and the band were setting up for tonight's concert." Mrs. Izumi stated as she got up and took her plate with her over to the sink area.

Dana giggled. "You should've seen them all dad. They looked like they had been sucking back laughing gas." She said. "And Dan. Man does he ever laugh funny!" 

"So what are your plans for today you two?" Mrs. Izumi asked as she began to clear the table. Mr. Izumi had since picked up his paper and unfolded it, but waited until his children were finished answering his wife's question.

"Well I thought it would be obvious." Dana stated. "I have a concert tonight to prepare for and I have lots of practice ahead of me for tonight."

"What about you Izzy?"

"Well, the rest of us thought we would go and be their "audience" while they practiced." He said and then gulped down the rest of his orange juice. "And help with some of the set up."

"Are you going to come tonight?" Dana inquired to both parentals.

Mr. and Mrs. Izumi looked at one another.

"I don't see why not." Mrs. Izumi said. "I think it will be fun. I haven't been to a concert since before we were married."

Suddenly the doorbell rang and Dana yelled; "I'll get it!" And quickly bolted out of the small kitchen and down the hall where the door was. There was a loud crash. __

_"I think we should move that shoe rack. That thing is always getting in the way."_ Mrs. Izumi rolled her eyes in thought as she dried the dishes. It was obvious that Dana had once again tripped over it in her excitement to reach the door.

Dana quickly picked herself up off of the floor and opened the door. She was expecting to see a certain someone who was supposed to come by and pick her and Izzy up. 

"Heeeelo." Matt said as Dana opened the door, but he wasn't the only one standing there. TK had come along as well.

"Morning." TK said as Dana invited them in. TK noticed the mangled shoe rack and a look of question crossed over his featured. "Uh…" He said as he looked at the shoe rack.

"You tripped over it again, didn't you." Matt said as he looked at Dana.

"Uh…yeah." She said as she ushered them out of the door way and then quickly pilled up the numerous shoes.

"Dana who is it?" Mr. Izumi yelled from the kitchen.

"Just Matt and TK dad." She answered back.

"Dana, dear, could you please put the shoes away properly this time instead of just piling them up near the door." Came Mrs. Izumi's voice. Dana cringed.

"Now I wonder how she knew that." Matt stated sarcastically.

Dana stuck her tongue out at him and walked into the kitchen.

"Izzy are you ready to go?" Dana asked.

"Yeah." He said as he got up off of his seat and then left with Dana, Matt and TK to the concert hall.

*

The concert was a big success. Everyone had pitched in and helped with the stage equipment. The band was very grateful and also surprised that nothing had been broken. Davis had been running around the stage while Ken and Izzy were fixing up the lighting. The crowd cheered the band on and oddly enough threw stuffed animals and roses at the stage.

"That such a wicked concert!" Davis yelled happily as the group Digi Destined made their way to the bands dressing rooms after the concert. 

The walked contently as they chatted about the concert and the fact that tomorrow was another school day. Tai shrieked when he found out that he still had a history project to do. Finally they came to the door that lead off into a type of main dressing room, but Matt's fellow band members and two other girls were standing outside. 

*

Behind the closed doors Dana and Matt stood on opposite ends of the room. Karynn and Tianna had just given her the greatest news. They had come all the way to Japan to ask her to once again be apart of KTD or what they were soon to be known as. Silver Dragon. They were going from pop to rock!

"Are you going to go with them?" Matt questioned from the opposite side of the room.

Dana just stood there. She didn't want to answer him, but knew she had too. "If you want me to stay I will." She said. "It's no big deal-really it's not." She said as her voice wavered.

Matt knew that it was a big deal. A very big deal to her and the choice he was about to make would hurt her, yes it would, but he knew that this was what her dream was and he wanted her to follow it.

"I think we should end our relationship." He blurted out without even thinking.

Dana's head shot up. "What?" She asked quietly. "Did you just say that…"

"It's getting kind of boring being with the same person all of the time." He said, trying to sound as mean as he could. All the while trying to contain his sadness while breaking her heart.

"You can't mean that!" She said as her eyes started to water. "Everything was fine this morning…what happened!" She demanded as the tears streamed down her face. 

"Nothing. I've been feeling this way for quite sometime now." He said. "I just didn't know how to tell you." He stated coldly.

Dana wrapped her arms around herself. "You of all people-I never expected this." She said and then looked at him one last time with silvery tears dancing in her eyes as she fought too keep them from falling anymore than they already had. "If that's what you want then…" She said and then ran out of the room and into the crowd of friends waiting for them.

Matt slumped to the floor and held his head in his hands. "I'm sorry." He muttered under his breath.

*

TK was about to ask what was going on the door burst open and out ran Dana, crying. She didn't even stop as she fought her way through the crowd that was her friends. Izzy ran after her and quickly stopped her. It seemed as if she were in shock, so Izzy held her by her arms to steady her.

"Dana what wrong?" He questioned.

"I'm going…" She said, as she seemed to look right past Izzy trying not to make eye contact with him.

"Going?" He questioned. "Going where?"

"I'm going. Not you or mom or dad can stop me!" She yelled as she pushed Izzy away and ran off. Izzy just looked on as she ran away. He wondered what had happened to her to make her ramble on like that, but her would find out soon enough as Matt stepped out of the dressing room. A depressed look coming across his features.

"Matt what happened?" Tai asked with a look of concern on his face.

"I-I dumped her." He said. His voice barely above a whisper.

"You what!" Mimi, Sora, Mika, Yolei and Kari stated.

Matt didn't answer. He just walked away. He wanted to be left alone.

*

After that I ran home and began to pack all of my belongings into suitcases for my trip. My parents and Izzy came home soon after I had left. My parents suggested that they leave me alone, which was quite a good suggestion for I was literally tearing up my room packing my things. Izzy didn't heed my parent's warning and I knew that he watched from my doorway as I silently cried myself to sleep that night. He didn't say one word of comfort. I guess he wanted me to know that he was there without having to say something.

I left for the airport the day after with my two friends. My rock career was about to start, but I wasn't at all exited. Every one of my friends had good tidings to give me, not once mentioning the night before at the concert. I didn't cry as I boarded the plain, just waved and said goodbye. It was finally time to say goodbye to my old life. Too leave it behind so that I could forget. Forget about everything. That was my plan all along. I did everything I could to forget, including ceasing contact with everyone I knew.

So here I am now. My plain has just landed in Tokyo airport and it's time to face reality. I managed to get a cab after that and told the driver where to take me. I was carefully concealed behind my Calvin Klein sunglasses as he drove on. For the first time in three years I was going home.

*

I knocked on the same door that I had entered so many times before and patiently waited for someone to answer the door. I began to figit and my breaths began to slow as I heard footsteps from inside. _Please don't be angry with me. Please._ I think to myself as the door opens….

*

"Dana?" Izzy asked bewildered. In the last three years he had grown so much Dana almost didn't even recognize him.

"Yeah it's me." She said as she pulled off her sunglasses and then was suddenly enveloped in a big hug. Izzy pulled her, along with her baggage into the house quickly after that. Dana removed her coat and shoes as Izzy looked at her.

"What?" She asked as she stood upright.

"You look different." He said as he rested his chin in his palm. "Besides what's with the clothes?" He asked and then continued. "They look like they're three sizes to big?"

"I-uh…"Dana was about to finish her response when she heard someone else.

"Izzy who is it?" Mrs. Izumi asked.

Before Izzy could say a word Dana walked right past him and into the living room where her father was reading the paper and her mother was knitting. Izzy was right behind her.

"Izzy who is…" She said as she looked up from the scarf that she was crafting. "Dana-is that you!?" She said quietly as she stood up and M. Izumi put his paper down.

Dana eyes began to water. Everyone just stood there until Dana broke into a run towards her mother. They hugged each other fiercely as Dana cried into her shirt.

"I'm so sorry mom." She said as tears streamed down her face.

Mrs. Izumi tried to comfort her as she lead her to the couch where she sat themselves down. Dana continued to cry and Mrs. Izumi could not understand why she was crying so much. She knew that Dana was crying because she felt bad about what she had done. It was mother's intuition, even though she was not Dana's real mother, she could still sense it. But there was something else that was wrong. Something that had Dana worried.

Mrs. Izumi took Dana's face in her hands and lifted it to where she could see. The crystalline tears streaming down her face. She looked into her eyes and something was definitely bothering her. It just wasn't the guilt of leaving and making no contact whatsoever with them. It was definitely something bigger.

"Dana tell me what's wrong?" She asked casually.

Dana hesitated a moment. "Nothing-nothing at all. I was just afraid that you would all be mad at me for what I've done."

Mrs. Izumi stared at her for a moment. Dana straightened herself up on the couch, slouching a bit to make herself comfortable. This was unusual because Dana had always sat up straight.

"That's not it." Mrs. Izumi said. "Something else is bothering you."

Dana looked horrified at her mother's comment. Izzy noticed and intervened.

"Mom leave her be. She obviously feels guilty about leaving." He stated.

"He's right dear." Mr. Izumi said.

"Oh no. Something else is bothering you Dana Izumi and I demand to know what it is." She stated firmly, but calmly.

Dana looked even more horrified now that she realized she _would_ have to tell them her secret. Her mother wasn't letting this one go. Dana knew that she would have to tell them sometime, not to mention that they _would_ find out, even if she tried to hide it. It was time.

Dana sighed and stared off into space. "After I left everything was fine. Everything started out great. My manager gave me the perfect sweet sixteen gift when she announced that we had a record contract with Universal records. It was everything I had ever wanted and dreamed of but I found out the hard way that these things don't last forever." She sighed and looked around to make sure everyone was paying attention and then continued.

"Last year was when everything went down the toilet. Karynn and Tianna were enjoying the fruits of fame and got into drugs, mostly marijuana. I objected and when asked to try it I declined and shrugged it off as a onetime thing. Then the parties began. They invited anyone and everyone to them just to get drunk. I managed to stay clear of the booze, but as I found out three months ago, even I'm not immune to getting drunk and doing very, very stupid things." She sighed as her voice wavered. "I'm pregnant mom and now you know."

*

_A/N: Aren't I evil! I am so mean! I just thought this would make a good plot and the story was inspired by various things…all of which I cannot remember…*dangit!* I hope you all enjoyed this part and expect more drama in the following chapters. I would also really appreciate your reviews! Thanks. ~Ducky_


	2. All Good Things Must Come to an End

Nothing to Gain

_Author's Notes: You're probably wondering why I don't have a disclaimer. Well that's because all of you know very well that I don't own Digimon, Bandai, or whoever owns the show does. As for the story, well I don't really have anything to say…I only got one review, well to my knowledge anyway. Oh, just read it before my evil side comes out and says something…_

_This story will also be told from the person's point of view at some points…so if you get confused tell me. If there is any change between point of views or scenes it will be noted with a *._

**Chapter 1: _All Good Things Come to an End_**

**__**

My soccer career had been going great. Everything was perfect. I had a loving family, a wonderful girlfriend and great friends who would stick by me no matter what. But now, now it wasn't so great. Everything was going so wrong for me. I ask myself why did this have to happen to _me? _Someone could have gotten badly injured, or even have died. But no, it had to be _me_ who was the one who got hurt. The one with the bright future as a professional soccer player! Not some drunkard who had no future at all!

It happened two years after Dana's departure on a weekend in June. I had just turned seventeen and had just gotten my license and was on my way to pick up Sora for our date. Kari had asked me if I could drive her over to TK's so that they could "study". I know what you're thinking and yes I'm exaggerating the "study" part, but I _am_ her big brother and I have a right to do that.

After dropping her off I made my to Sora's, _obeying _the speed limit. I never even saw the other guy swerving, all that while heading straight for me.

You're probably wondering if I remember anything. Well, I do which is a surprise considering that I had a concussion. I tried to swerve out of the guy's way, but didn't succeed in doing so before he rammed me. Everything seemed to go into slow motion just them. My life flashed before my eyes. My life growing up, my life with my friends, both human and Digimon, and the battles that we had fought and won. And now here I was, about to die because of someone who had one too many. Life is so ironic sometimes, isn't it?

Too my so-called _luck_, I had remained conscious the whole time. I could tell just from the inside of the car, that it had been totaled. I clenched my teeth when I noticed my leg. It had to have been broken in more than one place because it hurt like Hell. Not to mention the fact that one of my shoulders, which I later found out, had been dislocated. I mentioned before that I had a concussion…well I didn't notice! If you have a leg that looked like it was stuck in a blender (I am exaggerating again, but that was still my first impression), would you've noticed?!

After about, twenty painstaking minutes I was freed from the wreckage and rushed to Tokyo General where I was rushed into the emergency room, still fully awake I might add. I was starting to know what Dana felt like when she was hit by a car. But I have to admit I was amazed at how much blood that I had in me. Yeah, I know it sounds gross, but by that time I was so doped up the doctor looked like one of Kari's stuffed animals…don't ask.

I later found out that my leg had been broken in three places and that some of the tendons and muscles in my leg were either severed or ripped. I didn't think much about it at first that is, until the doctor told my parents and I that I would never again play another soccer game. My arm and head were suddenly put out of my mind. I was given the pros and cons, but none of it mattered to me then. I can still walk normally, just not play and what really bugged me afterwards is that Kari could have been in the car with me. She would have been killed too. The passenger side was crushed.

Right now I'm thankful that I'm alive. In fact I've taken up interest in something else, politics and that's why I'm headed over to Izzy's house, to snag a book off of him.

*

"You're what!?" Mr. Izumi barked. 

Dana cringed. She had never heard him raise his voice like that. She knew this was a bad idea, to come back here, and that she should have went somewhere else. But then again, they were her family and had a right to know that she was okay. But right now, that thought was far from Dana's mind.

"You heard very well what she said Jake." Mrs. Izumi said, a hint of rage in her voice. Suddenly she stood up and began pacing around the room, a distraught look coming across her features. Dana didn't want to know what her overall reaction would be after the initial had sunk in. But then she spoke, "How could you have been so careless and selfish!" She said rather harshly.

In all of his life with his parents Izzy had never once heard his mother sound so cold hearted. He knew she had reason and could hardly get over the shock of Dana's secret either, yet he made no move whatsoever to enter in on the argument.

Dana sat still for a moment and then looked up defiantly. "It's not like I planned this! I never meant to get drunk that night!" She said and then continued. "I never even knew that Steve would turn out to be such a jerk as to do that!" She said and then rose from the couch and was about to walk out of the room when Izzy stopped her.

"Where are you going?" He asked, in his normal tone of voice, trying not to berate her anymore than she already had been.

"She's not going anywhere." Mr. Izumi said. "We need to have a serious discussion Dana."

"Then have one!" She said, her voice rose a little higher then she intended it too and was met with, at first a look of shock from her parents and then looks of defiance. She looked at them for a moment and then proceeded towards the front door. "I'm outta hear."

"Oh no. You aren't going anywhere in your condition." Mrs. Izumi said.

"A condition! Well that's one I haven't heard yet." Dana stated sarcastically.

"Don't talk to you're mother in that tone young lady!" Mr. Izumi stated.

Suddenly the doorbell rang and Izzy was quick to answer it so that Dana or their parents wouldn't bite the person's head off. He opened the door and Tai stood there with a "hey how's it goin'" look on his face. He noticed Izzy's expression and became concerned.

"Is everything alright Izzy?" Tai asked as Izzy let him in. Tai noticed the suitcases near the door. "Is one of your relatives visiting 'cause I can come back."

Izzy sighed. 

"I will not stand here and be treated like a child!" Dana yelled and then barreled down the hall, ignoring both Tai and Izzy. She quickly put her shoes on and picked up her suitcases and like a flash was out the door.

Mrs. Izumi called after her to stop, but Dana didn't listen. Tai stood completely awestruck.

"Was that who I think it was?" He asked Izzy.

Izzy nodded. "Yeah, she just got home too."

"Really?" Tai said. "I almost didn't recognize her. Why was she yelling at your parents?"

"They were having an argument…" Izzy said, not finishing his sentence.

"About…"

"Dana." He replied.

"Okay…wait a minute!" Tai said. "I thought you hadn't talked to her for three years! So why are they at each other's throats?"

Izzy looked at Tai and decided to change the subject. "So what did you come here for?"

"That book on politics you said you were gonna lend me." Tai replied rather cheerily.

Izzy nodded and he soon disappeared down the hall and then quickly reappeared holding a thick book with a hard cover that was red in color. "Here." He said.

"Well I'll catch ya later, k?" Tai questioned.

"Yeah, see ya." Izzy replied as Tai exited.

*

Okay so I had no idea what was going on between Dana and her parents, but by the look on Mrs. Izumi's face it had to be something bad. But what? I knew Dana was busy when she went to America and all the interviews, records, concerts and music videos were just a validation of that fact. I just assumed that she was too busy and had tried to find the time to contact us and tell us how she was doing.

When I heard that Izzy's mom was sending her letters and not receiving any reply, we started to wonder about Dana's true intentions of leaving. We all knew that the breakup with Matt had hurt her tremendously, but we never thought that she would cease all contact with us, for _three_ years. That is until now. I thought that after three years of not seeing their daughter the Izumi's would be more than happy to see her. But something obviously didn't put their reunion off to a good start.

I was driving down Kokoro Street when I spotted Dana, sitting on a bench and as pathetic as it was, in the rain, which had just started to pour. She sat there, face hidden in her hands. She was obviously crying. I quickly shut the car off and exited. She obviously hadn't noticed. I walked over to her and knelt down.

"Hey, long time no see." I said.

She hesitated a moment before looking up at me. When she did her face was tear stained. Her hair was shorter than it used to be, just a bit longer than Sora had hers and it was layered. Her face didn't look as childish anymore.

"Tai?" She said. "What are you doing here?"

"Well," I started and suddenly felt the wind picking up. The rain didn't help either. "Um, why don't we catch up inside. Common," I said offering my hand to her. "We can go to my place."

She nodded and took my hand. As soon as her bags were in the trunk of my car we were off, to do some catching up.

*

 Dana sat silently as Tai rustled around in the kitchen. It was nice of Tai to pick her up. She must have looked so pitiful sitting on that bench in the rain. Pathetic. Why did she have to go and get _pregnant_. She cringed at the thought. She was totally disgusted by what she had become. Single, jealous and lonely.

"Is coffee okay?" Tai asked from the kitchen.

Dana remained in her state of mind. A thousand thoughts running through her mind at once. She didn't even here Tai call out her name. Tai peered around the corner and saw Dana sitting on the couch with what looked to be a look of either hatred or disgust on her face.

"Uh…Earth to Dana. Come in Dana?" He said and when he didn't get a reply he continued, "Oh no, Houston we have a problem."

"Wha…" Dana said rather perplexed. "What did you say?"

Tai looked at Dana for a moment and the shrugged. "Would you…like… some…coffee." Tai said rather slowly, expecting Dana to cheer up. It worked. She smiled.

"You haven't changed one bit." She said as she pointed. "Well except for the hair…where did it all go?" She said standing up examining his shortened hair do. She was almost his height now, take a few inches, but the loss of hair did make a difference in height. 

"I got it cut off." He said and then continued. "Where have you been for the…whoops, sorry." He said catching himself. He knew very well where she had been for the past three years.

Dana's expression saddened once again and she sat back down on the couch. Tai, having no clue what to do thought of the next best thing. "Would you like some coffee?" He said with a goofy look on his face.

Dana nodded 'no.'

Tai let out a sigh and plopped himself down onto the couch. "Okay I give up!" He said. "Do you want to tell me what is going on?" He asked. "Because you're not the Dana I knew. The Dana I knew was not a very depressive person and she didn't argue with her parents to the point where she would just get up and leave."

"How would you know?" She asked silently and then looked at Tai who had a look of surprise on his face. Dana sighed. "People change Tai, even me." She said and then continued. "The truth was that when I decided to come home that…." She said and then stopped suddenly, her had coming up to her mouth. _"Not again!"_

"Dana are you okay?" Tai questioned, but before he could get an answer Dana hopped up from her seat and ran towards the bathroom. Tai followed close behind and when he got to the bathroom the door was slightly ajar. He pushed it open and there was Dana, kneeling on the ground in front of the toilet tears streaming down her palled face.

"Are you okay?" He said knelling down beside her.

"Do I look okay?" She said between sobs. "I'm a wreck and as far as I'm concerned I've been disowned by my family." She said and then looked down at the floor.

Tai stared a moment trying to think of something to say and the only thing he could come up with was, "Are you sick or something?"

Thankfully Dana was in no mood to bite his head off. "You could say that." She said and then looked at him. The look that he was giving her right then suggested that she had an eating disorder because it smelled of vomit. "Do I look anorexic to you?" She questioned.

Tai nodded. "Truthfully, you look like you've gained a little weight but I really can't tell because you're wearing clothes that are what? Three sizes too big." He said as he pulled at one of her sleeves, which drooped.

"I did." She said as he helped her up and they walked back to the living room where they both sat down on the couch. "But not from eating." She said as she sat down.

"Well what other possible way could you gain weight?" Tai said exasperated. "The only way that I could think of a woman gaining weight was if she was…" He said and then looked at Dana who was nodding. "Pregnant." He said, not realizing what he was saying. It took him a moment to realize what he had said. "You're pregnant!" He said unbelievably.

"And prize number one goes to Tai Kamiya for guessing that Dana is pregnant!" Dana stated sarcastically as she held out her arm, her index finger pointed upward. "I guess you aren't so dense after all."

"But…but you can't be pregnant!" He said.

"Oh please, you're beginning to sound like my father." She retorted as she crossed her arms. "I just got home and my mother had to go and ruin everything with her _I-can-sense-something-is-wrong-because-I'm-a-mother _senses."

Tai, suddenly serious and ignoring her comment about him being dense replied, "They would have found out you know."

"Oh rub it in." She said. Her mood had definitely changed in the last few minutes because she was being really sarcastic. "Look," She said more seriously. "You can't tell anyone else. I want to keep this a secret for as long as I can." She said and then stood up. "Well thanks for inviting me over for coffee, although I can't have any. I gotta go now." She said and then began to leave.

"Wait a minute," Tai stated as she turned and looked at him. "Go where?"

"That is a very good question since I have no intention of going back home, not yet anyway." She said and then thought for a moment. "Probably to a hotel."

"Why don't you stay here?" He said. "It's only Kari and I right now because my parents are out of the country so there's plenty of room. It's better than staying in a hotel all by yourself."

"Where is Kari anyway?"

"At TK's." Tai replied with a tinge of force in his voice.

Dana looked at him and began to laugh. "You know they've always liked each other."

"So…" Tai said pouting.

"So stop acting like a baby and help me with my things." She said pointing to his car.

*

Until Kari had gotten home Dana and I spent most of the time watching television and chatting about old times. The happier times when we were young teenagers, not adults about to go into the work force. She had asked me at one point if I was still playing soccer. I told her no and what had happened. Her face palled when she found out and was very apologetic when she could have come to visit me or at least have known what happened.

We talked for hours. She asked how Sora and I were doing and she wanted to know how everyone was doing and what they had been up too. I told her that Joe had just finished his first year of medical school and had been given the nickname "Doogie" because he was our very own Doogie Howser. Sora continued to work for her mother in the flower shop after school and our relationship was going great. Yolei, Kari, TK and Davis were in high school, doing "teenager" stuff. Maki and Cody were in junior high doing teenager stuff with the other four. Mimi had gotten into cooking everyone backed goods and other foods anytime she could, and Joe found the heart shaped ones very cute. Izzy was already in his first year of college, Willis in his second and I was now into politics. Then came the last person, Matt. I really opened up my big mouth on that one. I felt like I had stuck both feet in my mouth when I told her that the Teenage Wolves were no more and that Matt had had several girlfriends after she had left.

"Dana I am so sorry." I said when I noticed a look of shock on her face. Something told me that she wasn't over him yet.

"Oh it's okay!" She said cheerily. Her mood had changed very drastically but I could see in her eyes that she was putting on her best face. Leaders know these things, okay. "I asked to know what everyone was up too and when I said that I meant _everyone_." She said coolly. "So when is your sister supposed to be coming home?"

I looked at my watch. "In about a half hour, why?"

"Well I know I said I wasn't gonna tell anyone about you-know-what, but I could really need more of a female to talk to and well…Kari is the most nicest and non-judgmental female I know." She said and then giggled, which was nice since she did seem quite depressed before. "Besides, you were acting as if you were the one who was going to have a baby."

"Thanks a lot." I pouted. I guess the way I looked was goofy because she was laughing, not lightly. She was letting it all out. "Calm down!" I said. "I don't want you to go into labor." I said somewhat seriously.

She immediately stopped laughing and then looked straight at me. We looked at each other for a moment and then she broke into fits of uncontrollable laughter. "You idiot!" She said. "I'm not due for at least another six months."

I was about to say something when I heard door burst open. "Tai I'm home!" I heard Kari call.

"In here." I called back. Dana had since managed to control her laughter and sat in silence on the couch. Kari walked into the living room and upon seeing Dana she screamed.

"Uh…hi Kari!" Dana said enthusiastically as she stood up and gave Kari a hug, which Kari gladly returned.

"When did you get here!" Kari said as they made their way over to the couch and sat down.

"A few hours ago." Dana said.

"Dana is going to stay with us for a while." I said to Kari who automatically gave me a questioning glance.

"Why? Didn't you go home yet?" Kari turned to wards Dana as she asked her question. Dana looked down and Kari, who has a knack for noticing these things automatically clued in. "What happened?" She asked.

Dana, without shedding a tear, as I feared she would and began to explain the whole story to my sister who listened attentively. No gasps of surprise or berating came from her as she listened to Dana's story…The whole story.

*

"Don't worry. Everything will be fine." Kari said as she put a hand on Dana's shoulder. Dana smiled. "But first things first." Kari said as she stood up, tugging on Dana's sleeves so that she too stood up. "You have got to change out of those." She said pointing out Dana's oversized clothing.

Dana looked down and laughed. "I guess they are a bit much." She said following Kari down the hall towards her room. "But they did come in handy for getting rid of those pesky press people." 

Kari laughed. "Is that why you cut your hair?"

Dana nodded. "Yeah…Anyway, I wanted something new." She said as they disappeared down the hall, leaving Tai alone on the couch to watch TV.

"Oh! Natural Disasters on the Discovery channel! Bring on the waves!" He said as he turned the channel and was greeted by a tsunami displayed on the TV. "Gotta love those."

*

Yay! Another chapter done! Just wait and see as this gets more dramatic! Oh! That tornado show is on! Gotta watch that! Bye! ~Ducky


	3. Brother My Brother

Nothing to Gain

_Author's Notes: I'm going to apologize ahead of time incase this takes me a really long time to write, but I hope you will continue to read the story as it continues. There will be many twists and turns and some surprises, not to mention the birth of Dana's baby. (I have such a good idea for that part…hehe.) So far this story is going as planned, although I may not focus on all of the characters, them having their own parts. So this is just a warning. Again, if you get confused please email me. I jump from first to third person quite often. Enjoy!_

_Disclaimer: I don't own it! If I did I wouldn't be sitting here wasting my precious homework time writing this. I would be animating it for your viewing pleasure! (Sorato...booo! Sorry Sorato fans!) Now if you'll excuse me I have to go and deal with the Hell Beast that lives in the napkin dispenser…stupid little thing sliced my hand! I'm not kidding either! * lol *_

**Chapter 2: _Brother, My Brother_**

**__**

I can't believe she could be so stupid and selfish. I can't believe I just said _that_. After all it's my entire fault. I wasn't there like I was supposed to be. I just stood back and watched as my parents and she fought. Then I found myself watching as she walked out the door. She hasn't been home in a month or so. Well, since she got back. Actually know that I think about it, she did the exact same thing three years ago, she just got up and left.

We know that she is staying with Tai and Kari for the time being. My mother has been crying ever since she left, my father is still somewhat furious, mostly disappointed and me, well I've visited her and we've talked never once mentioning what happened when she had first arrived back. I'm glad to say that she seems happy, despite her situation. Her belly is getting bigger everyday and she is into her second trimester. I'm just happy that Tai was there when he was and along with the help of Kari and Sora they are able to take care of her…and her cravings. * shiver * Dill pickles and ice cream with peanuts is not my idea of something edible.

I know that my parents want her to come home. I just wish that they would come to their senses and go and talk to her and try to persuade her to come home because it just isn't the same without her. Before she left she said that I snore. I miss the times when she would come into my room in the middle of the night and plug my nose and then laugh when I woke yelling and gasping for air. _Lay on your side or something Izzy. You could wake the dead with that snore._ She would say before going back to her own room. 

I just hope this plan I have to get her to come home doesn't fail. My mom and dad are going out of town for about four days and I've decided to get Dana to come back during that time. I've already talked to Tai about this and he in turn has told the select few that know of the unborn child. It's just gonna be me and her. That's it, just brother and sister catching up on old times and what has happened during that last three years.

*

"I'm not sure about this Izzy." Dana said stepping into her home. Baggy jean overalls were concealing her somewhat small figure and she was wearing a blue and white baseball T-shirt. This was her home, the place which she had tried to get away from for so long, only to come back and find herself banished once again. But now she was once again stepping back into the life that was once Dana Izumi and she felt safe and whole. "What happens if mom and dad come home and their not to thrilled to see me?"

"Trust me, I'm doing all three of you a favour." He said as he led the way to her room where he placed her bags and things. "Besides," He said pulling out a pair of car keys. "This arrived for you about two weeks ago."

"Why didn't you tell me!" She screeched as she grabbed the keys and ran out of the house, Izzy trailing behind. Both soon arrived at what seemed to be a storage shed. Dana watched as Izzy pulled out another key and unlocked the door. They stepped inside and Dana's eyes lit up. She suddenly squealed in delight as they both looked at the brand new silver corvette in front of them. She jumped in and started up the engine. "Well, are you coming or not?" She asked.

"You can drive?" Izzy asked bewildered. Dana looked at him questioningly. "What, I didn't think big time stars had time to take their driver's exam."

"Oh, I had lots of time, trust me." She said. "Well, ya comin' or not. Or are you afraid I might crash us into a hydro poll just as soon as I leave the driveway?"

"I'm coming, I just have to go and lock the front door." He said. Dana nodded and Izzy left to lock the door to the house. He soon emerged from the front of the house where Dana was parked, waiting. He ran up and jumped into the vehicle.

"Fasten your seat belt." Dana stated and then put the car into first gear. "It's gonna get a little fast." She said and then pushed on the gas pedal, so that it was touching the floor. "Woooohoooo!" She yelled as they went speeding off down the street.

Passers by watched as a flash of silver whipped past them, causing a trail of wind and dust as it drove past. A few small children yelled in delight as they watched the car race by. Dana soon decreased her speed when they finally came to a highway intersection.

"So what did you have planned for this weekend?" Dana asked as she waited for the traffic light to turn green.

"Anything." Izzy said. 

"Okay." Dana said as she continued to drive on when the traffic light turned green. "Oh, I know what we can do." She said with a smile.

"What?" Izzy said as he looked out the side window and then back to his sister when she replied to his question.

"Sit around and watch movies all night and eat nothing but junk food." She said and then put a hand on her tummy. "I have a really big craving for chips and chocolate ice cream."

"Sounds good. I haven't lazed around in a while. What with college and all." He said. 

"Oh that's right. Computer Sciences. I believe I'm sitting beside the next Bill Gates." Dana said laughing. "As soon as I can I want to go to college."

Izzy nodded. "What are you planning to study?"

"I have no clue, probably astrophysics or something." She said. "Hey there's Yolei's store. Let's go see her."

Izzy nodded once again and Dana drove down the street and found a small parking spot behind the store and quickly made their way into the store, hopping that Yolei was working today. They walked into the store and spied around for Yolei, but there was no Yolei. One of her sisters was a the cash register.

"Izzy, you find out where Yolei is and I'll get the movies and munchies." Dana said and quickly sped off down the chip isle where she proceeded to pick the flavours that she was craving. Izzy looked on with a shocked and somewhat embarrassed look on his face as Dana eyed a bag of sour cream and onion chips and opened it only to shove a handful in her mouth, while trying to hold the small basket. Dana noticed smiled and waved as she continued to eat.

"You think she could control herself a bit." Izzy heard someone say from being him. He immediately turned around and saw Ken with a basket full of groceries. His hair was shorter now and he no longer wore the uptight grey suit that he had always worn. "Geez, she even puts Davis to shame." He said with a smile.

"Hey Ken." Izzy said and spied the grocery basket he had in his grasp. "Grocery shopping again I see." He said with a wink as if hinting something to him.

Ken blushed pink. "If that's what you would call it." He said smoothly. 

Izzy smiled. "Where is Yolei anyway?" He questioned looking around to see if he could spot his lavender haired friend.

"She's upstairs. We've planned to go on a picnic today at the park." He said and then turned back to the isle, but there was no Dana. Ken took this time to inquire about his friend. He had obviously heard about her situation and had never once mentioned that he did, even though he knew that Dana knew herself that the news was spreading amongst their group of friends. There was only one thing that they agreed on, without Dana and that was not to tell Matt. Not only that she was pregnant, but that she was actually back. "So how is she doing?"

"Actually, not that bad. I think she getting used to the idea of becoming a mother." Izzy replied in all honesty. "We're going to have a little 'brother-sister lazy night' tonight just to get her re-adjusted to home."

"And let me guess," Ken said with a grin. "She put herself in charge of getting the snacks."

Izzy laughed. "You know that she once ate shrimp with honey, ketchup, and whipped cream." He said. "That's not my idea of edible. I can't believe she actually thought it was good." He said rather disgusted at the fact that the baby in her stomach was eating the exact same things. 

"Yeah, poor kid." Ken said as if reading Izzy thoughts.

"I'm guessing that your talking about what Dana has been eating lately." Yolei said as came down the stairs to stand behind them. Her hair was short now and she had let her bangs grow out. Her glasses were no longer giant discs but oval shaped, to fit her face. She was wearing a pair of cargo shorts and a white tank top.

"How could you tell?" Izzy inquired. 

"By the looks of disgust on your faces. Where is Dana anyway?" Yolei asked.

"Right here!" She said popping up suddenly out of the snack food isle. She had possession of several movies along with two full basket of junk food. Everyone spotted the two opened bags of chips and looked from the bags to Dana who had a smile on her face. "Sorry, but this little guy couldn't wait." She said as she patted her abdomen.

"Don't worry about." Yolei said with a smile. "Well I'm sorry that we can't talk any longer, but we have to go." Yolei stated eyeing her wristwatch. 

Ken nodded in return. "It was nice talking with ya Izzy. I hope we see you guys at the Summer Fair." Ken said. When he and Yolei were about to leave Dana suddenly piped up.

"What summer Fair?" She asked.

"Oh, the one next week that's being held at the college." Yolei stated. "Didn't Izzy tell you?"

Dana eyed her brother with an evil look apparent in her glare. "No he didn't." She said flatly. Meanwhile, Izzy was grinning like and idiot. It had never occurred to him that Dana would want to go. After all she was once a rock star…A very popular one who just happened to mysteriously disappear.

"Well why don't you come with us. It'll be tones of fun." Ken said, as if trying to persuade her to come with them.

"I'd love to go." Dana said with a bright smile while walking over to the cash register. "As a matter of fact I think it would be a lot of fun." 

"Good." Yolei said waving goodbye to them as she and Ken stepped out of the store. "Can't wait to see you there! We'll have loads of fun!"

Dana nodded as she paid the cashier. "Thanks." She said taking the many grocery bags, some of which Izzy took whilst leaving the store. They made their way to Dana's car and put the bags in the backseat. Once they were both in the car Dana stared at the steering wheel.

"Dana are you alright?" Izzy asked.

Dana suddenly turned to her brother, which in turn made him jump back. "Why didn't you tell me there was going to be a fair!" She practically yelled, which caused some pedestrians to look their way.

"Um, it slipped my mind?" He said not thinking of a better answer. He didn't really have an answer anyway. He must have forgotten about the fair.

"My ass it did." She said turning back to the steering wheel, placing the key in the ignition. "I should make you walk home…What are you laughing at Koushiro Izumi!" Dana said turning back to Izzy who was going into fits of giggles.

"Nothing." He said giggling. Dana started talking to him, but he didn't notice. He automatically stopped laughing when he saw someone approaching them. "Start the car Dana." He said not averting he gaze from the person walking towards them.

"What?" She said. "Oh no you don't, this is some lame excuse to get of explaining to me why you didn't tell me about the fair. I can see right through you Izzy." Dana said holding the keys firmly in her palm.

"Dana would you just start the car." He said finally looking at her. The seriousness of his eyes and voice were making Dana edgy now.

"Why? Izzy what's wrong?" She said looking at him with a degree of concern.

"I, uh…" He said trailing off as he looked up past Dana's shoulder. She slowly turned around and the one person that she had always dreaded seeing again was right in front of her.

"Dana?" Matt said with a look of disbelief in his eyes. Dana was about to scream bloody murder, but her brain would not allow her mouth to open. She just looked at him for what seemed to be an eternity. His hair was shorter now and he had definitely grown quite a bit in the past three years. She suddenly came out of her trance when Izzy poked her in the back. She quickly shook off her gaze to stare her ex in the face.

"Whoa, I hardly recognized you." Matt said noticing her shortened hair cut. "When did you get back?" He asked as Dana shifted uncomfortably in her chair.

Dana couldn't find the words so Izzy took it upon himself to answer. "About four months ago." He said without even thinking. Dana gasped when she heard him say that and quickly turned to him only to give him a wicked glare.

"Oh, four months." He said rather disappointed.

"Yeah, well I've been really busy settling back in. You know being away from home for three years and all." She said somewhat sarcastically, but Matt didn't pick up on it. "But a change was needed and I was getting tired of being a celebrity." She said.

"Dana." Izzy hissed. 

Matt suddenly picked up on her attitude and looked straight at her, now noticing her hurt and defiant glare. He really felt like a dunce now. He wondered if something had happened to make her want to come back home after all of this time. He knew perfectly well when she stormed out of the concert hall that day that he would probably never hear from her again. _It's all your fault pal. She wanted to stay. Couldn't you see that? _He would repeat time and time again in his mind. _You don't deserve her._

Matt shrugged of the lingering voice in his mind and turned his attention back to Dana and Izzy. "So are you guys going to the fair?" He asked, somewhere deep down hoping that Dana would say yes, just so he could see her again and have a real conversation with her.

"Yes…No." Izzy and Dana said at the same time.

"What are you talking about Dana?" Izzy said. He knew what was going on. Even though Dana said that she and Matt were completely through and that she had completely forgotten about him like the rest of her past, he knew that she still loved him. _You're gonna hate me for this Dana._ He thought to himself. "You just told Yolei and Ken that you were going to go and you were just yelling at me because I didn't tell you about it!" He said a little harsher than he would have liked to.

Dana just looked at him, her eyes giving a very distinct message as tears threatened to fall from her glassy eyes. _How could you…_

Matt all the while looked on as was very surprised when he heard Dana hiccup. He was suddenly being pushed out of the way by the car door when she opened it. She quickly jumped out and without thinking twice about how she looked she turned around and shot her car keys at Izzy. "I'm going for a walk!" She said and then ran off in the direction of the park. "Don't expect me home for a while!"

"Dana!" Izzy yelled, but she didn't turn around, she just kept running. He quickly jumped into the driver's seat and started up the car.

Without thinking twice, Matt rushed of in the same direction the Dana had been going in.  Izzy upon noticing tried to call to him to stop, but he was out of earshot. _Is she ever going to hate me._ He thought as drove off towards their house wanting to get the ice cream in the freezer before it melted all over the place.

*

Dana ran and ran paying no heed to any of the people around her. She just wanted to get away. She always seemed to want to get away. _Why does everything always seem to go completely wrong?_ She asked herself mentally as she sat under a shady tree in the park. She looked over the horizon as she sat at the edge of a fairly large lake. Birds chirped merrily as they sung to one another and children laughed as they played in the park on the other side of the lake.

Dana closed her eyes relishing the thought of total peace. She rested on the large tree trunk as the soft summer breeze tugged gently at her hair and clothes. Her tears had since ceased and she couldn't figure out why she had started to cry in the first place. Yes she heard what Izzy said and was simply mortified when he had told Matt that. _So you're not over him?_ Her conscience questioned. _Yes I am. I've moved on…just like him._ She answered back. _Oh yes Dana, keep telling yourself that._

Dana quickly shrugged off the annoying voice and turned her gaze towards the lake, putting a hand on her still growing belly. "I wonder what it will be like?" She said rubbing her stomach in circular motions when she felt the need to sing something that might some how describe how she was feeling…Lost and alone.

Dana quickly thought of the perfect song, or at least one of her favourites that had a deeper meaning to her. She once again rested against the large tree trunk and began to sing softly to herself and her unborn child.

"You'll remember me when the west wind moves   
Upon the fields of barley   
You'll forget the sun in his jealous sky   
As we walk in fields of gold   
So she took her love to gaze awhile   
Upon the fields of barley   
In his arms she fell as her hair came down   
Among the fields of gold…"

*

Matt was now walking through the park, which was usually crowded at this time of day and year. He quickly searched the grounds until he came across Dana sitting under a tree with her hands on her abdomen. He quickly rushed over, but when he realized that she was singing hid on the opposite side of the tree, listening to her voice.

_"…__Will you stay with me, will you be my love   
Among the fields of barley?   
We'll forget the sun in his jealous sky   
As we lie in fields of gold   
See the west wind move like a lover so   
Upon the fields of barley   
Feel her body rise when you kiss her mouth   
Among the fields of gold…" _

He heard her sing softly as if she were the only person in the world. He listened to every word as it left her lips. Only after three years had he forgotten her voice?

_"__I never made promises lightly   
And there have been some that I've broken   
But I swear in the days still left   
We'll walk in fields of gold   
We'll walk in fields of gold…"_

The song was that of someone longing to be held and maybe a promise to herself about her future. Even though it was an old song, probably a favorite of hers, her whole heart was being poured into it as if she had written it herself.

_"__Many years have passed since those summer days   
Among the fields of barley   
See the children run as the sun goes down   
Among the fields of gold   
You'll remember me when the west wind moves   
Upon the fields of barley   
You can tell the sun in his jealous sky   
When we walked in fields of gold   
When we walked in fields of gold   
When we walked in fields of gold…"_

Her voice had matured during the last three years. He barely ever watched her concerts, interviews or anything that would remind him of her or what he had done to her that day at the concert hall. He saw that pain her eyes when he told her those things. He just wished that she would've know that it was killing him to say those things. But that was in the past and he had since forgotten about her…or so he kept telling himself. That's why he dated as much as possible after she left, to forget her and start over. 

Without noticing the stale branch at his feet Matt was about to walk away, not wanting the inevitable to happen, when he stepped on the small twig, causing it to snap and give away his position. Dana's eyes shot up and she quickly stood walking around the tree only to see Matt trying to pretend that he was walking away casually, as if not noticing her.

"Going so soon?" She asked her voice void of all emotion as she confronted him. Matt froze in his tracks and turned back around to face her. "Or are you just trying to get away from me?"

"Dana, I…" He said.

She lifted a hand to silence him. "No, I know what you're doing. You're trying to make things right by going all noble." Dana stated, her voice showing hints of the rage within her. "Izzy told you why I came back, didn't he! That's why you came after me! To see if everything was okay! Well it's not!" She said finally getting her anger off her chest.

"What are you talking about!" Matt yelled back. "Izzy didn't tell me anything! The only reason I came to find you because it was on impulse!"

"What…" Dana said quietly as she stared back at him.

"I...Don't you see Dana?" Matt said softly. 

Dana shrugged off his comment and placed her hands on her ears but just as quickly she removed them and stood firm. "No I don't. I'm tired of this. My life has filled with nothing but pain, loss and sadness." She said as he listened to her, fearing what she might say next. "But when you told me that you were _tired_ of being with me that took the cake. For the first time I had experience the _worst _kind of rejection ever…from someone I loved." She stated as a tear slid down her cheek. 

The look on Matt's face then was one of sadness. _He_ had done this too her! Why did it have to be that way when he broke it off with her? He could tell now that she would have gladly stayed in Japan…with him. He was about to say something when she stopped him again.

"Don't say anything." She said as her gaze became firm once again, but still the crystalline tears fell. She was about to make the worst decision of her life, but she didn't know it. "I don't want to see you and I don't want to know you…you've given me nothing but pain." She said and then walked away.

"Dana!" Matt said as he began to walk after her.

She suddenly turned towards him. "Stay away from me!" She said and then ran of into the crowd of people in the distance.

Matt stood in silence. He couldn't believe what he had just heard. Without even thinking he walked over to where Dana had just been sitting underneath the tree and sat down, thinking about what had just happened. His conscience laughed at him as he sat in his own world of bleakness. _Nice going Matt. I've never scene something so pathetic. _It laughed. _She just told you that she loved you and what do you do, come and sit under this tree to sulk. Boo-hoo, poor wittle Matt got told off. You're pathetic! Why didn't you go after her!_

Matt never answered the question that plagued his mind. Quite frankly, he didn't know why he hadn't gone after her.

*

Izzy stood quickly when he noticed Dana stumble through the front door. Her eyes were bloodshot and her cheeks red. She was crying. They both noticed each other's presence and Dana quickly ran over to Izzy collapsing in his outstretched arms. With her hands covering her face as to not get his shirt wet Dana cried. She didn't just sob softly, she let everything out.

"I hate him Izzy! I hate him." She said as she cried. Now slightly taller than she Izzy hugged her. "Why did I have to see him again? Everything was finally starting to go the right way and he came back! I hate him!"

Izzy simply stood there. This was his entire fault, if _he_ had went after her none of this would have ever happened. He knew that one day they would meet again and it wouldn't be on the best of terms, but why did it have to be now? He sighed when she calmed herself down a bit. _Brother and sister night will have to wait I guess._ He thought to himself as he continued to hug his sister, like she was a porcelain doll that could be broken at anytime.

*

tbc…

I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. I'm not sure what I have planned for the next one but it will have to do with the Fair and Izzy and Dana's 'Brother-Sister Night'. The song that Dana sung was a song called 'Fields of Gold' and was written by Sting. It's one of my all time faves. -Ducky


	4. When I Grow Up

Nothing to Gain

_Author's Notes:_ **_Read me!!! _**_I am so very sorry! I must admit that I am a **very** big procrastinator and the fact that I'm almost done the second part of my original anime, Calidawn the Enchanted World. Gomen minna-san! I just hope it doesn't take me very long to write this chapter. Well I'll stop with the pleasantries, but just before I go some of you are probably wondering why any of the other DigiDestined haven't appeared yet…Just wait. They'll play out their roles in this story just like everyone else and hopefully I will get over this 'couples' block and write some couple scenes between any of the other Dig-iDestined and their boyfriend/girlfriend. I also have no clue what the legal drinking age is in Japan so, because it's my story, the age will be eighteen. (It's like 21 here, but I had a really good idea that couldn't be passed up!) Chao! –Ducky_

_Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon or the song that will be displayed at the beginning of this chapter. I do however own the concept of this story, as well as others, so this fic belongs to me…and what the Hell is that crawling up my wall! Eck! Bug! Wait a minute…it's the end of January and it's forty below! Why is there a really huge bug in my house!_

**Chapter 3:_ When I Grow Up_**

_'Tryin' hard to fit among you_

_Floatin' out to Wonderland_

_Unprotected, God I'm pregnant _

_Damn the consequences…_

_When I grow up I'll be stable_

_When I grow up I'll turn the tables…' –Garbage_

I'm such a complete and total idiot! Why would I ever expect to have her back in my life again, without her wanting to literally kill me? _This is your entire fault you now that._ I say to myself after I finally decide to get up from my spot under the tree where Dana had previously been sitting. I am now walking home. You're probably thinking I sound a lot like a computer or something electronic right now. Well that's thanks to the lovely Dana Izumi who shunned me. I did deserve what she said, after all I know for a fact that loud mouth himself told her about my other 'acquaintances' after she left. 

What would you expect? I knew after what I said to her that day after the concert she would completely hate me. Actually I knew right at that moment from the look in her eyes that I had really hurt her. She probably wanted to walk over to me and give me a good kick… But the one thing I don't get is why was she accusing Izzy of telling me exactly why she came back in the first place? I don't see any reason for her to come back, except maybe to see her family, but Tai told me that she never once came back in the three years she was gone and that she made no attempt to contact them. And what did she mean when she said that everything wasn't all right? 

I have to make you see Dana! I didn't want it to turn out this way, but because I'm a blundering idiot it did. I love you. None of the others could even compare to what I felt when you were around. I will make you see that this wasn't the way things were supposed to play out. I will not avoid you when I pass by you, but I won't call you either. I'll make you see that I still care.

*

One month later… 

"Mom did you see my purse?" Dana called out to Mrs. Izumi who was in the kitchen preparing something for dinner that night. Dana, in the meantime was in her bedroom searching through her things for her purse, which held her credit card. 

Dana suddenly spotted it in the back of her closet. She automatically went for it, but in her condition and because of her still growing abdomen she couldn't seem to get into a position that would allow her to bend down that far. "Screw this." She said finally standing up fully and giving up on the purse. She would have called for Izzy to come and help her but he wasn't home. He was _out with the guys_. "Great time to abandon me." She pouted.

"Did you find it dear?" Mrs. Izumi called as she finished up her cooking only to store it for later that evening. "Sora and the other girls will be here soon."

"Yeah I found it." Dana said rather annoyed at the situation when Mrs. Izumi popped her head in the doorway.

"Well then what's the problem dear?" Mrs. Izumi asked as she stepped into the room.

"I can't reach it." Dana said eyeing her mother, who in return gave her a questioning glance.

In a matter of seconds Mrs. Izumi clued in. "Oh! I'm sorry dear." She said as she walked over to the closet, picked up the purse and handed it to Dana, who had a rather far away look in her eyes. Mrs. Izumi took notice to this and immediately tried to sooth her fears. "Dana, look at me." She said to her adoptive daughter who had previously averted her eyes. "Everything will be alright."

"But how do you know that?" Dana stated. "I mean…I'm only eighteen years old. I'm not ready to be a parent. What if I screw up this kid's life or something? Maybe I should give up the baby."

Mrs. Izumi took her by the shoulders and looked her straight in the eye. "Dana, listen to me. You are going to be a wonderful mother to this child and you are not going to give it up." She said emphasizing her point to the fearful Dana. Dana looked at her as she continued giving the teen nothing but the truth. "You got yourself into this and your going to get through it and we are going to help you as best as we can."

Dana nodded, her eyes watering. She was about to speak when they both heard a knock at the door and then a voice calling, "Dana are you there?"

"I'll be right there Mimi!" She yelled walking out of her room as Mrs. Izumi watched from where she was standing as the girl left. She looked down in thought and then popped her head back up when she realized Dana had pooped her head back in the room. "You're going to be with me when I get my ultrasound right?"

Mrs. Izumi nodded. "I'll be there. I wouldn't want to miss it."

Dana nodded happily. "Bye mom!" She said as she ran out the door to join Sora, Mimi, Kari, Maki and Yolei on their way to the mall.

*

"So are you guys ready for the game?" Willis asked as the other guys as they finished packing up their sweat clothes after and afternoon of working out. 

Joe, being the health nut that he is, insisted that they should all at least work-out once a week after observing how lazy they were becoming. Everything just seemed so boring, compared to their prior adventures in the Digital World. Nothing was the same. After their adventures everything seemed to go downhill. First Dana had left and had not bothered to contact anyone for the past three years; she had also managed to get herself pregnant, second was the fact that communication also seemed to be lacking between _all_ of the Digi-Destined, and third was the fact that their leader, the one who would never let anyone down had finally fallen and could not get back up. Tai was a wreck when he found out he wouldn't be able to play soccer anymore. That's something else that Joe had insisted upon…Tai's physical therapy.

"You bet! I can't wait to see those guys in action!" Tai yelled energetically. Tonight were the soccer playoffs between England and Germany, and it would prove to be quite a game. "So who'd turn is it to house the festivities?"

"Mine." Izzy said rather solemnly. Everyone looked at him with 'oh' looks on their faces, which Izzy had noticed. "Don't worry." He said with a look of total stupidity on his face. "Everyone's gone so we have the place to ourselves. My parents are going on a weekend trip and Dana won't be home until late tonight." He stated when he noticed that Matt had started to fidget.

"Okay, good because I plan to get plastered tonight." Tai stated. "Since I can't do it very often."

"Nice, very nice Tai. I'm sure Sora would love to see you in a drunken stupor." Joe stated. "Besides, if there's going to be booze no one is driving." He said. "I know for a fact that you Mr. Kamiya like playing drinking games."

"What! I said I couldn't do it often so I like to make it worth the time." Tai stated rather irritated. "Besides, I'm not as stupid as the guy who took away my future career."

"Whoa, calm down you guys." Izzy said trying to keep the peace. "Don't worry, you can spend the night at my place. My parents are gone for the weekend and Dana is out with the girls, so she won't be home until late tonight." He said as they made their way to their cars. Since he did have his own vehicle, Dana let Izzy borrows hers, not needing it because the other girls would be coming to pick her up.

"Hey, does anyone know where Davis, TK and Ken are?" Joe asked throwing his gym bag into the back of his car, noticing there were three of them missing. 

"Oh well, since they're under age they decided to have their own party at Davis' place." Matt said, finally speaking up, adding to the conversation. All the while he had kept to himself, questioning whether or not to go to Izzy's that night, but after much deliberation he thought it would be a good idea. After all, Dana wouldn't be there. "So, when do you want us to show up?"

"The game starts around seven, so be there around six or six-thirty." Izzy said jumping into the car. "Well see you guys tonight!" He said speeding off out of the parking lot.

"Bye!" They yelled out in unison.

*

Dana shifted uncomfortably in the chair she was sitting on. Right beside her were dozens of bags full of clothes and toys. The girls had insisted that she buy herself some new clothes for her pregnancy instead of just wearing overalls all of the time trying to hide it. It was evident now that she was definitely pregnant, but despite her protests the girls had managed to sucker into the clothes that were, according to Mimi, very stylish for expecting mothers. Dana could still hear their insistent voices ringing in her head.

"Common on Dana! It doesn't matter if your pregnant or not you can still look good." Mimi said motioning for Dana to try on a very pretty summer dress.

_"She's right Dana. No offense, but the overall look doesn't suit you enough for you to wear it all of the time." Sora commented and then stated on a more serious note. "Everyone knows that you're pregnant anyway."_

_Kari coughed. "Well not everyone." She pointed out. Sora, who blushed at her mistake nodded in understanding._

_"How long do you think you can keep this a secret of him?" Yolei questioned. "You know he's going to find out sooner or later. Why do you keep it hidden? It's not like what he thinks matters to you anymore…" She said and then noticed Dana's look. Someone else seemed to notice as well._

_"It does bother you, doesn't it Dana?" Maki said. "You're still not over him."_

_"Of course I am. What are you talking about?" Dana protested automatically taking the dress from Mimi and moving towards the change room. "I think I will try this on. It **is** rather nice." She said and then shut the door to the change room._

Dana's thoughts lingered on the last words her cousin had spoken to her. _"Your still not over him."_ Dana sighed in agitation. Her mother was still not there. _Oh where is she?_ She thought to herself and then smiled when she noticed the familiar face in the doorway, but someone else was with her. "Mom…Aunt Chris, I had no idea that you would be coming."

"You're mother thought it would be nice for me to come." She said.

Dana nodded. "I was afraid that you wouldn't get here in time. I must admit, I'm kind of afraid. This is the first time I've ever done this." She said and then noticed the looks on bother her mother and her aunt's faces. "What?"

Her aunt was about to say something when a nurse appeared right behind Dana. "Miss Izumi, you may go in now." She said softly to Dana, who nodded in return.

Dana was about to walk off with the nurse when she suddenly turned back towards her mother and aunt. "Excuse me." She said to the nurse, who quickly turned around. "May they come in as well?" She motioned towards the two elder women.

"I'm afraid that only one other person can be in the room with you and the doctor." She said. 

"Go ahead Suzanne." Dana's aunt said. "I'll come to the next one, besides someone has to watch her stuff." Christine said pushing the other woman towards her niece.

Suzanne nodded in thanks as she walked with Dana and the nurse down a hall and out of view. 

The nurse led the two women down a hall with several doors to a room near the end. The door was open and on a stool sat a woman with short blue hair and bright green eyes. "Doctor Kido." The nurse said handing her the chart with all of Dana's medical information on it. 

The woman flipped through the pages and a smile crossed her face. "Thank you." She said to the nurse, who then let Dana and Mrs. Izumi enter. She directed them in and then left the room to attend to her other duties.

"Well Dana, it's nice to finally meet you." Doctor Kido stated and held out her hand. "Joe has told me stories and so has his father for that fact. I'm gathering that your leg is much better."

"Your Joe's mother." Dana said shaking her hand. 

Mrs. Kido nodded. "Yes I am." She said and then continued. "Shall we get started then?" Dana nodded. "Just hop up on that table and lay on your back." 

Dana did as she was told and hopped up onto the padded table. "This isn't going to hurt, right?" Dana questioned as the doctor flipped switches all around her.

Mrs. Kido smiled. "No it won't dear. I just need you to relax. Now Dana, I need you to undo your overalls and lift your shirt a little so that I can get a clear picture of the baby." Dana nodded and undid the overalls, slipping the oversized pants so that they rested just below the navel of her large abdomen. She slid her shirt up so that is rested just below her breasts. "Okay this may be a little cold." The doctor said as she squirted a clear cream onto the younger girl's abdomen. Dana shivered and Doctor Kido let out a good-natured laugh. "You never get used to that stuff." She said as she placed a paddle on Dana's abdomen. She began to make circular motions, searching for the unborn child. 

A smile came across her face when she finally located what she was looking for. "You see that blob right there Dana?" She said pointing to the screen across from her. 

Dana turned her head towards the black and white screen. "Yes, I see it." She said.

"That's your baby Dana." Mrs. Kido said.

Mrs. Izumi, who was sitting down quickly stood up to join the doctor and her daughter, who stared mesmerized at the sight before her. For the first time in a long time Dana smiled a genuine smile as she stared at the picture before her. _My baby._ She thought to herself as a stray finger glided across the screen.

*

"Come on! Open net!" Tai yelled at the screen with a drunken slur as he watched the English team gain control over the ball. "Are you guys sleeping or something!" He yelled again. Even though Tai couldn't play the sport anymore he still watched it with just as much passion.

Everyone groaned when England finally scored. Tai, who had yelled with glee turned to Izzy, Willis and even Joe, who were all smashed with a questioning look. "Bottoms up!" He said merrily as he chugged half of his beer. Tai had made it so that every time England had scored a goal they would take a shot. Everyone else, except for Matt, went along with it not expecting England to win…

Now, after several scores and shots Tai, Izzy, Willis and Joe lay unconscious and snoring on the couch and floor. Popcorn and chips adorned the carpet and couch. Willis who lay sprawled out on the floor had a licorice stick up one of his nostrils, causing a whistle effect when he drew breath, this was punishment for passing out too early. Izzy lay on the couch, half on and half off. Joe lay on the floor in between Willis and the coffee table and Tai, lay happily dreaming of who knows what, with a half eaten licorice stick in his mouth.

Matt, who didn't really feel in the mood had only had a beer and was no sitting on the couch watching the television, trying to see if there was anything remotely good on at eleven o'clock at night. He finally settled on the music channel where a rather gothic looking rock video was playing. He was about to change the channel when he noticed a familiar red head with two other girls floating around in the air.

"Whoa." Matt stated when he noticed the way the Dana look in the video. He gathered that it was probably just made last year, since she looked more like a woman now than a fifteen year old. Like the other girls, her clothing wasn't very modest. They all wore black and their make-up was equally black. The make-up made Dana look more like a ghost because of her somewhat pale skin. Her hair was also very long with black streaks in it. "She definitely changed." He said as he sat in silence watching the rest of the video.

*

Dana sighed opening the front door. After getting a clean bill of health for both her and the baby, Dana had gone out for dinner with her mother and aunt. She was sad when she found out that her mother had to leave rather early to join her father because they were going out of town for their anniversary. Dana seemed equally happy to have found out that she would be giving birth to a baby girl. _Mimi was right._ She thought to herself as she placed the many bags on the floor so that she could shut the door.

After locking the door she made a mad dash for her room, wanting nothing more than to get the many shopping bags that she had had to carry around all day. She was glad she took Mimi's advice and bought both genres of baby clothing…but most of it was girls'. She quickly discarded the many bags onto the floor near the closet of her room, only to head back to the kitchen, she was famished.

Matt had noticed the door open and shut and then someone walking down the hall towards the bedrooms. He quietly got up and made his way to the door that separated him and the others from the kitchen, all that while trying not to step on or trip over someone while trying to get there.

He opened the door and quickly made his way over to the sink. He had made up the excuse to himself that he was thirsty, but he already knew who had just entered the house. He removed a glace from the cupboard and turned on the water, leaving it run so that it would be cold. When he was satisfied with the amount of water in his glace he shut off the tap and began to drink the water, as if he were someone lost in a desert that had stumbled upon an oasis. His body suddenly went rigid when he heard a gasp from behind. He slowly turned around knowing who it was.

"What are you doing here?" Dana questioned rather angrily. "Where's my brother?"

"Izzy, Tai, Willis and Joe are all passed out on the floor in the living room because we were invited to watch a soccer game and they got drunk." He stated, staring her directly in the eye. Dana crossed her arms over her abdomen. _She looks a lot bigger than when I last saw her._ Matt thought to himself. "Go see for yourself if you don't believe me." Matt said, actually hoping that she would stay where she was, hoping that she hadn't lost all hope in what was left of their relationship.

"Fine." She simply stated before turning on her heel and opening the door to the living room, exposing the four unconscious men. 

"Am I right or not?" He questioned, a little sarcastically.

Dana shook with furry and she turned around to meet his gaze and for a split second Matt was actually contemplating to run away. "Why are you still here then!" She nearly yelled.

"Because I thought I ought to keep an eye on them, like a good friend should..." He stated and then continued. "And not leave without saying a word."

"You above all should know why I left!" Dana said.

"But for three years Dana, without ever contacting anyone…most importantly your family." He stated going a little further than he should have.

"I said I had my reasons! I don't answer to you or to anyone else for that matter anymore! I…" Dana said but then stopped when she felt a sharp pain run through her abdomen. She just shook it off as if nothing had happened, until another came sending her to her knees.

Matt noticed and hurried over to her, kneeling beside her figure. "Dana what's wrong?" He asked, somewhat frantically.

Dana's face cringed in pain as another came, forcing her to release a cry. "It too early." She said in raspy breaths. _This is not happening…please don't let this happen!_ She yelled to herself mentally.

"Too early for what?" Matt asked looking down at Dana, who's eyes had began to droop. "Dana?" He questioned just as she passed out. "Dana!" He said frantically shaking her. "Hang on." He said lifting her form into his arms and making his way to his car as fast as his feet would carry him.

*

_"Doctor Matsumoto please report to pediatrics."_  A female voice sounded over the intercom as Matt sat patiently waiting. It seemed as if every time he was around Dana she seemed to end up in the hospital. _"Doctor Matsumoto to pediatrics."_ The voice repeated. Matt looked at his watch. "Almost one." He said and then sat back, trying as hard as possible to stay awake. He had tried several times before to contact Dana's parents, but it seemed that where they were they could not be reached. He had no clue where her aunt and uncle were and her brother along with three more of his friends were passed out on the floor at her house. "This is just great." He said to himself as he leaned over so that he could rest his head in his hand.

"Ahem, Mr. Ishida." Came a gentle, but gruff voice in front of him. Matt stood up automatically realizing the presence in front of him. "I'm Doctor Hamano," The woman in front of him said. "The girl you brought in, Miss Izumi I believe, suffered from a stress related attack. But both of them should be fine."

Matt gave the doctor a questioning look before speaking. "What do you mean by 'both of them'?"

It was the doctor's turn to give Matt a questioning glance. "Miss Izumi is pregnant and suffered from a form of stress related premature labor pains." Doctor Hamano said and then noticed Matt's extremely shocked expression.

_This has got to be some kind of sick joke. _He thought to himself, trying to process the new information. _I mean…not Dana. Wait a minute…the mood swings, the 'everything is not okay', her weight…I should have picked up on it sooner._

"Mr. Ishida are you alright?" The doctor asked.

Matt nodded. "Can I see her?"

The doctor nodded. "Down that hall, room 234." She said pointing down the long corridor. "We will need to keep her for just a few more hours and then she can be released."

"Thanks." Matt said and then made his way down the hallway. When he was finally in front of his destination he stared at the closed door for a few moments before opening it to reveal Dana, once again in a hospital bed.

Dana noticed the new presence in her room, but she simply stared out of the window. It was a single room, she was thankful for that. She needed space right now. The doctors had told her that it would be best that she go somewhere more relaxing as soon as possible after her release. Finally she had an excuse to use that beach house in Kyoto that she had purchased with her millions. She had always loved Kyoto. The house, though wasn't like those gargantuan celebrity houses that you see on Entertainment Tonight. It was small and simple. Basically it was a place to relax. 

"Thanks for bringing me here, but you don't have to stay." Dana said turning her gaze towards Matt, who seemed lost in his own little world. He was starring at her, possibly as if she had just murdered someone. _What's his problem?_ She thought to herself.

"How are you both doing?" He asked silently with complete innocence in his voice. 

Dana froze and then managed to say; "What are you talking about?"

"The baby Dana." He said rather harshly. Dana, by now was sitting up, the evidence of her pregnancy clearly showing through the thin blanket that was draped over her. Dana cast her glance downward not being able to make eye contact with him anymore. "Do the others know?" He asked, but she didn't answer. "I'll take that as a yes…damn it Dana why didn't you tell me?" He asked, while frantically pacing around the room.

"Because it was on a need-to-know basis and _you_," She emphasized. "Didn't need to know." Dana stated trying to calm herself. She _would not_ let him get to her. Not this time. Not when the baby could be in danger if she got too stressed out.

Matt, who was finally able to stand still, was trying to find the words to say but none would come. _Oh who saw this one coming? Raise your hand!_ The annoying voice inside his head laughed, mocking him. _You know Matt, it can't get any worse that this right now so why don't you just say something?_ He thought to himself and then said the first thing that came to mind. "Who's the father?" __

Dana's mouth hung open and her face was red with both embarrassment and anger. She clutched the blanket that covered her so tight that her knuckles were turning white. "How dare you ask such a question!" She yelled.

_I think it just got worse…smooth move man._ The voice said again, in a fearful tone.

"Well what do you want me to say?" Matt stated and the continued rather sarcastically, "Wow, your pregnant Dana…I never expected that you'd be a mother so soon! Well congratulations!" He said, a little more cold-hearted than he would have liked to. 

Dana's eyes began to water and quiet tears crept down her face. "You asshole." She said quietly but continued. "Well why don't I just give you all of the necessary details. I'm now a total of five months pregnant expecting the birth of my first child at the age of eighteen. The _father_ doesn't even know that he is expecting _his_ first child because he was too drunk to stick around and the _father_ of this child is of no concern of mine, or yours or anyone else's for that matter. Now, if you don't mind leaving me alone, I would like to get some rest so that I can be released. Now leave!"__

Matt was utterly speechless at this point. His chance of salvaging what feelings she had left for him were probably gone. She had said what he was and he believed it, because he had acted like a total asshole. _Stupid mouth of mine…doesn't know when to quit!_ He yelled mentally as he was walking out of the room…it was definitely better if he left her alone right now. Just as he was walking out of the door he uttered one last sentence to her. "For what it's worth…I _am_ sorry." He said and then shut the door.

"So am I." Dana said to herself as fresh tears crept down her face as she cried herself to sleep.

*

To be continued…MWA HAHAHA! I'm really sorry this was so late, lots of homework and junk to finish, ya know. Well anyway, I have no clue when the next chapter will be out…probably not anytime soon, but March break is coming so I'll hopefully be able to get some serious writing in. Oh yeah and the legal age for drinking here is 19, so I'm only a year off…lol! -Ducky 


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